Yesterday, I had the great fortune to do a keynote speech at the Georgia Public Risk Management Educational Conference in Savannah, GA. Because of the pandemic, it was my first time in front of a live audience in 881 days.

In the days preceding the conference, I fine-tuned my presentation and began to practice my oral delivery. It should have been “a piece of cake” as it’s a topic which I wrote a book about and have been speaking about for more than 10 years. The first dry run faltered badly. Thank God it was an audience of one – me! Perhaps I was just a bit rusty. After a break, I gave it another try which was only marginally better. 

A bit freaked out, I walked away to settle my nerves. Relating my concerns to my wife, she agreed to make it an audience of two. Dry run number three was even worse. My wife had some great inputs and I tried to incorporate them. After another break, we did it again, this time, recording the session to listen to the delivery. OH GOD! I sounded terrible. My confidence was shaken – Do I have premature stage fright? Would I go down in flames – I hoped not.

The day before my speech, I would have about four and a half hours in the car to listen to the recording and discuss ways to improve with my wife who was traveling with me. I didn’t say it out loud, but I was scared. I was fearful. We listened to the recording and paused a few times to talk about my delivery all while my wife assured me all would go well. Upon arrival at the conference hotel, yet another dry run – better, but far from acceptable. The morning of the speech, another dry run (not looking at my wife), and much, much better!

Shortly before, the 8:30 a.m. introduction to a roomful of people with high expectations, I’m singing Bugs Bunny’s Overture to myself. “Overture, curtain, lights, this is it, the night of nights. No more rehearsing, or nursing a part…” Then, the session moderator gushes about me and fires up the audience. I’m ON. Turns out F.E.A.R. – False Evidence Appearing Real had struck. I was on, energized and exhilarated! Sixty minutes later, a friend who has listened to many of my presentations gave me the best compliment when he said, “I’ve seen you on your feet many times. Today was your best.” 

There are two lessons to be learned here. My fear really was false evidence appearing real and practice does make perfect. I got my mojo back in the nick of time and am ready to pursue many more speaking engagements. I hope to see you at a conference near you. Always remember: Life is short, be BOLD!

Thank you to the Georgia Public Risk Management Association for the opportunity…I loved seeing y’all.

54 Years ago, February 19, 1967, a bright sunny Sunday afternoon. I’m just short of my tenth birthday and in the fourth grade at St. Adalbert’s Catholic School in South Milwaukee, WI. As I toil over some sort of mundane homework, my parents walk in the door and report they were evacuated from the church/school complex because of a natural gas leak.

Not particularly proud of this now, but my thoughts turned to the school blowing up and if it did, would I need to finish the assignment which was due the next morning? Within a few minutes there was a loud boom and I raced out the front door into the middle of the street to see what could be seen two blocks to the east where the church and school was located. What I saw was a white cloud of smoke and dust rolling across the street. I remember this like it was yesterday.

Fast forward to 1981 as I completed a graduate degree in Safety and embarked on a career in Safety and Risk Management. Could the explosion at my school have incubated a career? Maybe, maybe not. However, for the next 39 years, risk management was my business. For the first five years of my career, I was a safety specialist in a nuclear weapons manufacturing facility in Oak Ridge, TN. If ever there was a need for safety… 

As the Cold War neared its end and peace was beginning to break out, things in the nuclear weapons business began to slow. With that downturn and an eye toward career development, I shifted my focus to governmental risk management focusing on cities, counties, school districts and other special purpose quasi-governmental agencies. On to Southern California, Birmingham, Alabama, and finally to Charlotte, North Carolina where I found my forever home!

Stay Safe My Friends,

Dan

Special Note: Today, I dedicate this blog to my uncle George who passed away several weeks ago at age 90. He was a master story teller and quite the family historian. I’m sure he would have loved this story and could have added some details that I have long forgotten. Rest in Peace uncle George.

Merry Christmas almost. Every year on Christmas Eve, I reminisce about traditions from many years ago growing up on South Milwaukee, Wisconsin and wanted to share some of my many fond memories of Christmases past.

 For my family Christmas Eve was the night of celebration, family gatherings, and a visit, or three from Santa. My memory goes like this – in the mid to late afternoon on Christmas Eve, my mom, dad, brother and two sisters would pile in the car for a very short ride to my grandmother’s (dad’s mom) house. It was located directly behind and actually connected to a little hardware store that she operated. It was more of a general store as she sold everything from nails and paint to personal hygiene products, games, and school supplies. 

The store was always open, on Christmas Eve until about 5:00, or 6:00 p.m. for those last-minute shoppers that just had to buy one more gift. That is how I learned to wrap presents, or not, as I still suck at wrapping presents. Joining our family at the store were my aunt (dad’s sister) and uncle and their two children. Every now and then, my uncle (dad’s brother) and his family would join us from wherever they were living at the time, be it Houston, Pittsburgh, London, or who knows where else?

While the store was still open the celebration activities would begin. There were all sorts of appetizers, that might include: bacon wrapped mushrooms, bologna pinwheels made with horseradish cream cheese, cheese and crackers including “chicken ‘n a biscuit” crackers, and sometimes cannibal sandwiches (google it as it relates to Wisconsin). AND, the star of the show was always peel and eat shrimp. One particular Christmas sticks in my mind where my parents raved about grandma buying five pounds of shrimp for our celebration – it sounded like truckload to me and they were GOOD!

As closing time for the store approached, the adults would make a few adult beverages and the kids would enjoy some sort of soft drinks that were always available at grandma’s house. Around the same time, me and my cousin would place some milk and cookies near the door in the back hallway for Santa. We always threatened to stay in the hallway to wait and see Santa, but always chickened out. Thus, Santa would drop off a box of presents, have a few bites of his cookies, drink his milk, ring some bells and be on his way.

Filled with excitement, we would lug the box up the steps, and distribute the presents left by Santa. There were only a few presents for each because we knew that Santa would also pay visits to our home a few blocks away and my other grandmother’s house about 10 miles away. After opening our gifts, we would hang out for a while longer and eventually load up the car for the trip to our next stop.

At my mom’s mom’s house, there might be a houseful. Mom’s two brothers, her sister and their kids could fill up grandma’s little house quickly. I remember walking into the house, and it felt like a sauna because grandma had been cooking most of the day. There usually was Polish sausage, ham, maybe turkey, green beans, mashed potatoes, and a plethora of desserts, one of which was this lady finger chocolate torte thing with real whipped cream on top.

Same as the other grandma’s house, we hung out, ate, the adults may have had an adult beverage, and the kids drank sodas (Or was it pop? Back then, I used the terms interchangeably). Unlike the previous house, Santa had already been to this grandma’s house and left presents under a small tree in the living room. The younger kids (me) were always ready to open presents and probably pestered the crap out of the adults to get to that part of the evening. Amazingly, Santa usually left presents handmade by my grandmother – she knitted some of the greatest mittens and slippers. Sometimes there might be a ten-dollar bill inside. 

Once we opened presents, it was my tradition to begin asking if we could go home yet. “Is it time to go home yet,” I asked, and to this day, 50 years or so later, a few of my cousins still ask me if it is time to go home yet. Yep, it was time to pile in the car again and go home.

Upon our arrival at our home, we would discover that Santa had indeed made a visit to our house and left a few more presents for our family members. We took turns opening presents and in later years began a name exchange so each of us didn’t have to buy presents for everyone in the family which would have proven costly. We would then hang out at home, play with toys, games, or a friggin’ wood burning set that Santa brought me, but I think he really meant it for my mom because she liked it much more than me.

Some years, we would stay up late only to pile into the car again for a two-block drive down to St. Adalbert’s Catholic Church for Midnight Mass. I thought going to church at midnight was pretty cool as it was way past my bedtime and the choir was there in their best tune singing Polish Christmas Carols in Polish. I didn’t understand the language, and because of that it had a special singsong to it that is burned in my memory to this day. After church, we would greet some friends, neighbors, and relatives in the church’s vestibule and then load up the car for the short trip home.

Once we were home again, we might stay up for just a bit to reassess the Christmas gift haul we had each made. Then it was off to bed with visions of more festivities, turkeys, ham, Polish sausage, and desserts that would be enjoyed the next day when we did all of the visiting all over again sans the presents. Regardless, Christmas day was always a special time for family and friends.

That’s how I remember it. I look forward to my siblings and cousins filling in a few gaps, but that is how I remember it. With that, I say Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Dan

I’ve been away from my blog for a while, in quarantine, or socially distant during the pandemic. Many of my readers have been to various professional conferences over the years. Many of you may know that a lot of conferences have now gone virtual with a series of on-line presentations, Q&A sessions, and even virtual vendor booths.

A most difficult part to replicate from the “live” conference experience is the face-to-face networking with old friends, new friends, vendors, spouses and others. There is no replacement for that personal interaction. None-the-less, I have been recruited to bring a group together by making cocktails in a webinar format for Verity Solutions in conjunction with the 340B Coalition Virtual Summer Conference. My task is to show attendees how to make two cocktails in the comfort of your own home. The two cocktails will be the traditional Old Fashioned, and the Modern Old Fashioned.

Important Note: The perfect Old Fashioned is one made by your or your favorite bar tender to your personal liking. My two recipes are as follows:

The Traditional Old-Fashioned Recipe

·      In an Old Fashioned/Cocktail Glass:

·      One sugar cube, or approximately one-teaspoon sugar, or equivalent simple syrup

·      2-3 dashes of Angostura Bitters

·      Splash of Club Soda

·      Muddle above with a pestle to dissolve the sugar and make a slurry

·      Add a large cube of ice (large cubes melt more slowly and help to not water-down your drink)

·      Pour 2-3 ounces of your favorite whiskey over the ice and slurry

·      Stir the solution for about 30 revolutions

·      Cut a generous piece of orange and lemon rind and squeeze the essential oils over and into your drink

·      Slide the rind into the glass as a garnish and enjoy

The Modern Old-Fashioned Recipe

·      In a Mixing Glass:

·      Two sugar cubes, or approximately one and a half teaspoons sugar, or equivalent simple syrup

·      2-3 dashes of Angostura Bitters

·      2-3 dashes of Bitter Truth Orange Bitters

·      Two Maraschino Cherries and a little bit of cherry juice

·      A small slice of orange fruit including its rind 

·      Splash of Club Soda

·      A splash of Grand Marnier Liqueur

·      Muddle above with a pestle to dissolve the sugar and make a slurry

·      Add a large cube of ice (large cubes melt more slowly and help to not water-down your drink)

·      Pour 2-3 ounces of your favorite, whiskey, or brandy, or some other brown liquor over the ice and slurry

·      Stir the solution for about 30 revolutions

·      Strain into a cocktail glass containing a large piece of ice 

·      Cut a generous piece of orange and lemon rind and squeeze the essential oils over and into your drink

·      Slide the rind into the glass as a garnish and enjoy

Remember: The perfect Old Fashioned is the one you make (or have made) to your liking. Even when drinking at home, always remember to drink responsibly.

Life is short! Be BOLD! 

Yep, you read that correctly, Happy New Year! I haven’t blogged since early December 2019. Lots of life has been happening since then, so let’s go…

The current big news of course is the Corona Virus (COVID-19). The virus has me in self-imposed social distancing. Accordingly, I’m finding a little time to write this blog. I won’t delve into the myriad subjects around the pandemic – there are plenty of other pundits out there to do that for us. What I would say though, is to get your information from multiple sources far and wide and make your own smart and right decisions on what you should do. Don’t ever rely on just one source. Stay informed!  

So, Happy New Year! I was reminded of the New Year yesterday, when a great friend of mine reflected that it would be another whole year until we celebrate St. Patrick’s Day again. With that, I began to think – every day begins a new year, we don’t have to wait for January 1 to renew, refresh and move forward.

I’ve got some exciting news, I have a fresh printing of my book, ready for you to order and enjoy. The second edition corrects a few typos and replaces a “You Can” story. The book is also available on Amazon as an e-book and also available in audio format – read by yours truly.

Today’s lesson is, every day is the beginning of a New Year. With every day a new year, your resolutions can stay fresh and renewed!

 Happy New Year!

 Dan

I interrupt the 37 things to bring you some hair washing advice – not really, though this title is in reference to washing one’s hair and I’ll get back to the 37 things in the next blog.

So, about lather, rinse, repeat – if you followed that advice in washing your hair, you’d be in an endless loop and would never complete the task until you either ran out of shampoo, or water. Just in time for Christmas and the upcoming new year, I have taken delivery on the second edition of my book, Life is Great, Even If Your Boat Flips Over. Besides correcting a few typos and inserting an update in the YOU CAN chapter, one major change is in the conclusion; and that conclusion is to Lather, Rinse, Repeat; or, in terms of the book, Read, Implement, Re-read.

You see, in building the life of your dreams, it is necessary to continually evaluate where you are in order correct, or change course, if warranted. Thus, the advice in my book is to continue looking at where you are and where you would like to be heading. Life is too short to not strive for the best life that is true to our own being. 

Bonnie Ware, in her book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying wrote about her many years of experience working in palliative care and reported that the top five regrets were:

1.     I wish I had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

2.     I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

3.     I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

4.     I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

5.     I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Don’t reach the end of the road with those regrets. My mission in life is to change the world by engaging individuals and groups in a dialogue that results in a change of thoughts and actions for the betterment of life. I think my book can provide you with a few nuggets that will help you find and live your best life without regrets. Just don’t forget to wash, rinse and repeat!

Dan

P.S. A perfect stocking stuffer, or gift for a friend, relative or colleague. Buy five of my books and e-mail me the names of the individuals to whom you wish to gift the book and I will personalize those books for you before delivery. 

Recently, I heard Santana’s version of Oye Cómo Va on the radio.  I thought to myself, “what does that title mean?” A quick internet search revealed the interpretation – “listen to how.” Listen to how – WHAT? A little more research and I discovered the next line in the song is, “mi ritmo.” Together, it means “listen to how my rhythm goes. That got me to thinking…how does my rhythm go and how does your rhythm go? 

If synonyms for rhythm include, beat, pace, tempo, pulse and more, it’s not difficult then to interpret your rhythm as your vibe. I once saw a t-shirt that read: “Never trust an atom, they make up everything.” If we accept for fact that atoms are always moving (save for not knowing what would happen at absolute zero), then every object, animate and inanimate has a vibe caused by the movement of their atoms and that vibe matters.

It’s not just your personal vibe. It is the vibe of the universe that surrounds you that is important. If you are feeling stuck, down, or unfulfilled, check the vibe around you and see how you can change it. Here are five ways to adjust your vibe.

1.    Take care of yourself. There’s no set definition of taking care of yourself. What matters most is that you regularly put your needs and priorities ahead of all others on a regular basis. Taking care of yourself could be as simple as taking a five-minute break from your task at hand. It could be pursuing fitness goals, reading a book, writing a book, or learning a new skill. Whatever it is, take care of yourself.

2.    Be optimistic. Look at the bright side of things. Even when faced with seemingly insurmountable odds, look for the light at the end of the tunnel. All good things in life take some trouble and toil to realize. Don’t give up – move ahead. Discard your inner Eeyore and find your inner Helen Keller. Eeyore always found the negatives while Keller achieved many great things. Despite being deaf and blind from 19 months old until her death at age 87, Keller was the first deaf and blind person to earn a Bachelor of Arts degree. Look around, you’ll find you are much better off than many others around you. Embrace your advantage.

3.    Become comfortable in your own skin. “I’m not vain, or conceited, I just haven’t found anyone better than me yet.” I’m not sure where I picked up that quote and it probably isn’t the best mantra to adopt. However, when you try new things and figure out the things you are good at through trial and error, you will begin to experience life and become comfortable in your own skin. Eventually, you learn that most people are too worried about who they are than to give a hoot who you are. This doesn’t give you license to be a jerk, but it does give you license to be free and live the life you want to live. Feel your vibe and go with it!

4.    Get out of your comfort zone. Recently, I was asked, “What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do?” The answer didn’t immediately come – it took a while to find the answer. Now I know -- the toughest thing ever for me was to end my first marriage. Why? Because that marriage was comfortable. It wasn’t misery. We didn’t hate each other and still don’t. We simply grew apart, or never grew together. Eventually, we split amicably and at least for me, it opened up a whole new existence. Are you too comfortable not being who you want to be?

5.    Declutter. As I write this, there’s a good bit of clutter on my desk. I can feel its vibe. It says get me out of the way and where I belong. Decluttering will allow me to decide what’s important and not. Decluttering will reduce the stress of not knowing what is under there and I might find a gem for a future article. Is your vibe cluttered?

 What’s your rhythm (vibe) telling you?

 Dan

Have FUN! – ”You’re having fun? We can change that!” This is a direct quote from one of my former managers. AND, change it I did – before he could kill the joy. Sure, some things in life require the seriousness of a brain surgeon laser cutting someone’s grey matter. Even in that serious business, I would speculate that most surgeons find their work to be fun on some level. One’s fun is another’s toil. 

Steve Jobs used to ask himself this one question each morning, “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” If his answer was negative too many days in a row, he knew it was time for a change. He didn’t essentially equate the question to fun, though it seems to be implied. Some may say, “Yeah, but that was Steve Jobs, he could afford to change up what he was doing.” I say, if YOU are answering that question in the negative too often; YOU can’t afford to NOT change!

The University of Warwick in the UK found productivity of workers to increase by 12% after workers viewed a 10-minute comedy video. Fun also relieves stress, improves connections with others, aids memory, retention, and learning. 

It’s not just about the work you do. It is all parts of your life. You owe it to yourself – If you’re not having fun, you need to change it up and find some fun. Synonyms for fun include: amusing, pleasant, entertaining, and lively. Antonyms include: boring, unpleasant, unhappy, and disagreeable. Which do you choose, the former, or the latter?

Get out there and find your fun! 

Dan

Everyone is Smarter than You… – An executive coach once gave me a little sign that said, “Who besides me can get this done?” His purpose in giving me the sign was two-fold. First, to remind me that delegation helps to develop the skills of staff and, second, to free my calendar for tasks that were more strategic in nature. You see, I had fallen into a “trap” of saying to myself, “Oh, this is easy, I’ll just knock it out.” Then, when I found it taking longer than I thought, I ended up delegating the task anyway, and then it was with an urgent deadline which wasn’t fair to those to whom I delegated.

Old habits die hard, and over time, I got better at delegation. Because many of the delegated tasks came back quicker and better than I could have imagined, I soon realized the edge others had on me. This led me to embrace the mantra – Everyone is smarter than you about something. And, it doesn’t just apply in the work setting. 

Every day we are bombarded with things about which we know little. That’s when it might behoove us to check in with others. Get inputs about how to deal with whatever you face. A medical condition might need a second opinion. A mechanical problem in your home may need the advice of an expert. An investment that sounds too good to be true, might be if you check in with others. Even news stories, and conspiracy theories deserve a double check. AND, be careful, don’t let biases lead you to seek only the answer you wish to hear. Everyone, and I mean everyone is smarter than you about something? Trust me – or check me on what I say. What do you say?

Dan

Write an ANGRY E-mail – I used to say that I wanted to be secure enough with my position in life to write a work e-mail that began: “You obviously had your head up you’re a$$ when…” Having hit send on a terse e-mail or ten (none of which were that brash), I’m here to tell you the result is not an uplifting salve for the instant emotion. While I won’t deny the existence of a short period of jubilation in one’s ability to be acerbically witty. Almost always, what was written comes back to “bite” you. And with that, there is a great lesson to learn.

Dr. Stephen Covey wrote about the “Emotional Bank Account.” Covey posits that being kind, courteous, keeping promises, being loyal to those not present, and making apologies when you do mess up, grows your emotional bank account held by others. Conversely, he suggests withdrawals are made through being rude, crude, blunt, breaking promises, being disloyal, or arrogant. 

A former boss kept a ledger of deposits and withdrawals. Though he was a good boss, he definitely kept score. No. He wasn’t looking for his staff to kiss his butt. He expected deposits as defined by Covey and frowned on withdrawals. Further, deposits and withdrawals weren’t of equal value. One co-worker put it like this, “it takes ten atta-boys to erase one aw shit.”  With that, you might as well be depositing instead of withdrawing.

Wait. The title of this blog suggests writing an angry e-mail. Yes, it does. You can still write that e-mail. Here’s how to do it. Open an e-mail message and address it to yourself (it is dangerous to address it to the party with whom you are aggrieved). Better yet, open an electronic document, or get out a piece of paper to handwrite your proposed message. 

Begin writing. In writing your message, go for it! Tell ‘em what you really think. Let it all out. Don’t hold back. If you really must, hit send, but make double sure it’s addressed to only YOU. Be careful. Having worked in the public sector for a long-time, even e-mails sent to myself were public information and discoverable. Then, delete it, carry the paper to the shredder and find a more rational way to deal with the situation without making any withdrawals from the emotional bank account. 

As Dr. Covey says, “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood®” Perhaps you missed something or misinterpreted what you think you heard or read. What do you think?

Dan